The random rumblings in my mind.
I think of Life
In the incremental ways that you look at a situation and gain more insight as time passes. But to do that, you require an open mind, otherwise you end up with a skewed view. The radical notion that all people who pass through your life add a sketch to the drawing called your life is called being existing – being alive.
A friend who is also a colleague is sitting across from me and she is a bit stressed. Something isn’t going her way, or as smoothly as she hoped and I observe her facial muscles tighten up around her forehead, relax and tighten again every-time she speaks or contemplates anything.
Her eyebrows tilt and forehead muscles tilt up making a slight frown as she speaks and she makes a baby face when amused.
Her left hand is always around her face, many minutes of her working day, I only see her at work, ever.
In a few years, I suppose you could tell the life she has lived watching her. Or at least her habits, the inherent and consistent ones.
The laugh lines that add to age, the wrinkles – a fair bit amount I am sure will be on her forehead for she’s forever tilting it up into a frown.
You can tell someone who has walked barefoot for years on end by the cracks on their feet.
You can tell the innocence of a child’s life by the innocence of their gaze. The confusion when they experience some pain the first time. As they grow gradually, they lose the incredulous wonder of a new experience. Like their first taste of ice cream, the first feel of pain from touching something too hot. The wonder of seeing the first rainbow after rain.
I talk of a friend who may never wrote of her.
I don’t think anyone remembers their first rain. But rain is such a phenomenal experience for children. Children want to run barefoot in the rain. But for something so phenomenal we have no memory of our first experience. I do not remember my first rain. But I am sure I did want to run in the rain. My parents would never let me. I was a sickly child.
I had an “undiscovered” experience. I never got diagnosed hence “undiscovered”. It happened a few more times in the colder weather ( just harmattan in the north of Nigeria, the weather could get to around 12ºC or so i think, but never as cold as the west; the western world’s temperature in the negatives is just funny. Feels like punishment for buying and selling humans as chattels. They deserve.)
My blood would freeze up in my hands during cold weather. Well frozen blood is what it felt like. The first time it happened I thought I was dying. There were no adults at home. I was doing the dishes outside the house. It was the harmattan season. The weather was cold, arid and dry. And all of a sudden, my hands stayed in the shape of holding a utensil. It wouldn’t stretch out. Try as hard as I may. I cried so badly. I went into the house and the warmth of the room warmed my blood after a while and my hands flexed properly again.
So I think I have lived a dramatic life.
It was a startling experience and my reaction was so much more dramatic. But I was a child and it was a first experience. So I learnt of the emotion panic. I don’t remember learning fear, I suppose we are born knowing that very crippling emotion. Nor do I remember learning Joy. I however learnt my expression to deep joy. It is a high pitched squeak; my reaction to joy.
I remember learning about the practicality of electric shocks. We had a standing fan in my parents room with an open knob Control? Regulator? I am not sure what that part is called . It is however the part of a standing fan that controls a standing fan’s movement. I had a “novel” idea to force stop the fan with my hands. Well, I landed on my parents bed. I thought someone had thrown me. I could have passed away that day if I landed elsewhere, say on the floor head first. And so I respect electricity in all its forms. And so I know many ways to avoid an electricity shock.
And so I have many similar life’s experience and my journey of learning myself incrementally.
Like how I do not like breadfruit, even though seemingly the rest of the world loves it. How I prefer warm foods as opposed to cold, how I prefer savory foods as opposed to crunchy foods, how I prefer bland, umami and spicy tastes to sweet and/or sour tastes.
Often when people ask “tell me about yourself”, the above words should be the answer, but I just say oh I work for The Tonic Tech and we are very good on gitfcards offering high rates and quick payouts.
What do you say when people ask you ” Tell me about yourself?’
